We had a long holiday week that kinda sucked towards the end. Not because where it was going. It was more of what it was making me feel.
The whole house emptied with the rest of everyone, except us, away for a holiday. We were able to keep the house clean. Vacuumed what we could and sucked stacks of cat fur all around. What I wasn’t able to manage was, my own room… It remains cluttered and overwhelming.
For the past 4 days, I keep finding new things that one of the cats (or more) would have peed on. It is so disheartening. First it was my bathroom mat. Then one of the other towels that they (the kids) chucked on the floor. Then another of one of the other towels. And yet another.
This cycle didn’t stop there. It kept going with a slush in the middle of the floor in my room. And Melon climbed onto my bed and half way did it. Aih. So I had to remove the blanket. A few hours later, I laid on the bed and musk pee on half of the pillow. Internally feeling deranged but what can you do?
On Sunday, I asked the kids to run out the schoolbags for a washing. Adam’s bag had pee on it. He changed bags. I also smelled pee in the corridor of our room where our daily duffel bag is. It was also peed on.
The last straw was getting out of the house yesterday and smelling of pee on myself. Like, WTH? It appears that the cat peed on my leather sling bag and the bag was sitting on me in the car. WTH WTH WTH! All this broke me. I had no mood to clean. I lost all (of like the quarter) effort I had in me to reorganise things.
Later in the night DH called to say he was on the way home. So I decided to make coffee and wait for him outside the house as usual. There was pungent pee smell so bad. It took me a while to find the source. 2 carpets were hanging on the balcony of the patio. They were soaked with pee. Both carpets. I didn’t know who they belonged to, thinking it was my parents. They were Elder Sister’s. She brought them to the house for cleaning.
Why? So many whys. So, so many.
This morning when waking them up for school, Adam’s other bag too had pee on it. Like, WTH. And after settling the house, the kids, about to leave the room for work, the corridor area smelled of pee.
In the wake of the harrowing cat bladder problem, Elliot hasn’t been well. Both he and Talullah had been running around the house late night. They keep bargaining about shower. So he ran a fever, had to depend on the nebuliser, Citrezin for flu as well as Bromhexin to drain all the phlegm. It is 3 days including today.
Can I top it off with me menstruating on Sunday? Yes. So I had been overweight, dripping in sweat with the weather and weight, breathless lounging myself, the need to eat and just zoned out. At night I keep awake, thinking about how to make the room bigger, where of course, it couldn’t. And of course, because I just can no longer function to sort out my room, DH sighs at the sight of it saying that no one knows how to keep things clean and tidy (as he – which is true as he cleans well). But he hasn’t the time, again on 24-hr shifts for days.
Also Younger Sister kept texting from abroad asking about her sick cat. Hey, you’re sick enough to leave your sick cat to travel for a week without leaving anything here to manage him with so don’t go asking about his wound or whether he ate or not. The cat is depressed from another cat’s rejection to mate. The female cat has yet to return home. Seriously, your F cat’s depression is not my F problem.
I wish The Cousins or the Gaines from Fixer Upper could come and fix the whole house. I can’t deal with the no space, no maintenance, the bad wiring and their not wanting to improve the place at all, especially my dad. He seems to think that money for food doesn’t exist. They just appear on the plate.
Aih. So many issues. You just can’t expect things to just settle for you, you know. This cycle will not end if you don’t learn to sort out your own issues and try to be compassionate with other people’s lives. Not just to sort things out because they are convenient to you.
So many many many sighs.
Living in a House of Bricks (with so many cats and people who doesn’t want to deal with their own sh*t)
Update: Everyone just video called me from abroad. Asking about Younger Sister’s cat. #meh